Side Note: French People Lurv Exams

In France, when you want to be a teacher, you have to pass a concours, or series of exams. Now, when you take an exam like this in the U.S., we set a certain score as our arbiter of success: score above the mark, you win! Score below the mark, and your teachers will be blamed for your failure! In France it works a little differently; let's say you want to work in District X, and there are five available positions for history teachers based on growth or retirement. Among all the folks taking the history exam, the top five scorers pass; everyone else fails.

It doesn't matter how good you are in the classroom; it doesn't matter how well you interact with students; it doesn't really even matter how much you know about history: if five other people know more than you (or are just better test takers), you're screwed. The upside of this, I'm told, is that you can take this annual exam "as many times as you want." To which I say, I only one to take the exam once, thanks. I want to pass it the first time based on a fixed standard of achievement, and I want to then be offered a job based on my own merits.

The reason for the tough selection process is that if you pass, you don't just receive certification, but you're guaranteed a job. You go into the national education system and they will assign you to a post in your district. If you don't like the school, tough. You have to wait a few years and build up points in the system, because transfers are based on seniority.

There's also an argument that these exams are impossible for non-French people to pass. One woman wrote a whole book about how native English speakers are destined to fail in the French educational system, because... wait for it... our English isn't good enough. (Which is a whole other blog post. Trust me.) So even if I wanted to stay and teach forever in France, I'm pretty much SOL.

Silver lining: the upside is, there's a huge pool of subs to draw from. Because everyone who's still waiting to "pass" the exam can work as a long-term substitute for folks who go on maternity leave, break bones, or walk off the job in a fit of student-induced insanity. (There are no short-term subs here; if you're going to be out a few days, you just cancel class. Sweet.)